Inner Relationships

I have a really imaginative mind, and I tend to understand things best through stories.

So imagine this:

Inside of you, there’s a couple with a child. They live in your heart. But if your heart is still holding onto pain, avoiding emotions, carrying anger… their home reflects that. It’s broken. There are spider webs everywhere, dust in every corner, windows shattered, no running water. The child is constantly crying, throwing tantrums. The father disappears for days, drinking, gambling, being unfaithful.

And her? She isolates herself. She runs away from people, escapes to high places. She wants to fly. She connects more easily with animals than with humans. She leaves the child in that broken house and disappears. They don’t even share a bed anymore. He’d rather end up in a stranger’s, and she’d rather hide away in some remote cabin in the mountains.

No one feels safe. No one feels grounded. And nothing really changes.

Until one day, something steps in. Call it child services, call it intervention, call it a wake-up call. It sees what’s going on and gives them a choice: change things, or lose the child.

So they choose to try.

It’s not easy. Not even close. They have to face themselves: their patterns, the things they’ve buried their whole lives. Slowly, they start healing. Letting go. Surrendering.

She stops chasing. He stops running.

But first, he has to heal. He becomes more grounded, more stable. Clearer about where he’s going. He comes back home and starts fixing things, the windows, the pipes, the structure of the house itself.

Then she comes back too. Hesitant. She doesn’t fully trust it yet, doesn’t trust that the house won’t fall apart again. But something in her has shifted. She’s had enough of everything that held her back. Past trauma, old patterns, conditioning. She still loves her freedom, still feels that pull to escape sometimes… but at some point, she realizes something.

The home she was searching for was here all along.

So she stays. She starts cleaning, decorating, letting light in. She cooks, she nourishes herself and him. They begin to communicate. He trusts her intuition. She trusts his direction. There’s no more chaos, no more constant conflict. There’s a sense of calm when they go to bed at night.

Eventually, the child is brought back.

And this time, everything is different. The house is warm, bright, alive. The child’s room is full of light, of comfort, of safety. The child is happy. Laughing, playing, at ease.

They become what they were always meant to be: a balanced, supportive, grounded family.

And really, this is about the relationship we have with ourselves. Call it yin and yang, inner masculine and feminine, whatever name you give it, the dynamic is often the same.

So ask yourself this: What kind of relationship would you choose to raise a child in?

Probably not the first one.

Now think about your inner child. What kind of environment are you giving that part of you to live in?